ML:
I just cannot write to you and tell you how I feel because I don’t know how I feel about you/your friendship myself.
I’m weird, and you knew more about me than most people I know, and at the same time I don’t think you really got to know me…
I am sure you are a great guy, nice friend and you supported me in many ways, but I guess that is where the real problem arises. Someone made me see I was holding on to you, and I that I was using you as a shield for anyone who wanted to approach. People often tell me this is a way I have to *protect* myself, by becoming ‘unavailable’ and in this case it was because of you.
Don’t get me wrong, I appreciate you, but you also confused me by your comments. You surely know that you took part in this as well as I did.
And at last, I think I never got over the part of not telling the truth. If there’s something I can’t seem to forgive easily is when someone lies to me. It hurt me when you didn’t trust me enough to share this, because if there was someone to whom I was open to, that was you… and it sucked, cuz at the end everything fell apart.
Hope you understand that, in my own way, letting you out of my life was my way to get myself back together… and I’m sorry if, while doing this, I caused you any worries…
Take care and have an AMAZING LIFE, be good, I wish you the best ML!
c. velázquez
